My New Un-Resolutions

I’ve been reviewing  3 basic tasks for spiritual development: honoring ourselves, discovering our expressions and sharing our expressions. Along that line, let’s revisit an idea of resolutions for the beginning of 2017.

Instead of twisting myself in knots out of a framework of faults, I wanted to set my path from a value-added mindset. So I began to think about what would enhance me this year. You may want to consider something similar for yourself.

I recently saw a post I thought was a good beginning. It recommended replacing every “I’m sorry” with “I appreciate.” Instead of “I’m sorry I was late” I can say “I appreciate your waiting.” “I’m sorry I can’t stay” with “I appreciate the time I’ve had with you.”

Another area I’d like to consider is limiting the inner critic. “To compare is to despair” is a helpful slogan. I noticed that if I am aware of a difference in ability or approach in someone else, it can become an opportunity to compare. Not advisable. So instead I want to use it to appreciate others and myself. Instead of berating myself with “Why don’t I…” or “Why can’t I…” or “Why didn’t I…” I want to make this year a time to raise appreciation for all of the strengths we benefit from. “I appreciate her ability to…” or “I appreciate his willingness to…” adds to my honoring myself rather than diminishing self-esteem.

Most top resolutions are around health and money. Health: usually weight or exercise and money: usually saving or investing. How can we turn these potential negatives into positives?

Nothing changes without acceptance. It might seem that we accept a condition or we wouldn’t want to change it. But more often we do not accept it and that is why we want to change: as an attempt to rid ourselves of what we don’t like about ourselves.

Acceptance means that we can affirm our worth without changing anything. What would happen if we didn’t change? We can release this dread, anxiety or fear because it is energy that keeps us in turmoil and actually works against our changing.

So let us appreciate the bodies we have and the money or resources we do have. As we send this energy, changes occur more positively, without resistance, and we add a dimension to  honoring ourselves that motivates. So I can say “I appreciate my body and am open to learning the best way to take care of it.” “I appreciate my salary and am eager to learn how to use it in the best way.” “I am grateful for the money in my account.” “I am happy I can pay this bill.” “I enjoy taking walks.” “I am looking forward to swimming more this week.”

Framing our desires in terms of enhancing ourselves to me makes them much more appealing and I am more willing to pursue the changes they create.

Happy Honoring!



Published by Fessup

A 30-year veteran educator and counselor, published author, lifelong student of religion and women's issues, educator with, mother, and lover of Far Side humor.